Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Album Review: Dick Delicious and the Tasty Testicles "Vulgar Display of Obscurity"

I love comedy. I love metal. I love album art that makes fun of Pantera's Vulgar Display of Power.
Another thing I love is reviewing albums for great bands. Which I have here. The album being reviewed today is Vulgar Display of Obscurity, the new release from Comedy Metaller's Dick Delicious and the Tasty Testicles. Lets have a little read in.


The album opens up with a Law and Order feel, an audio sketch entitiled "The Earth Vs. Dick Delicious". Instant laughter kicks as a court session involving Dick Delicious, 57 gallons of semen, and "surprise sex". All the sudden we kick into the song "Viagravated Assault." Catchy name, obviously implying extreme amounts of Viagra used during "surprise sex" with a woman. Which is why "Bitch got him arrested for Viagravated Assault." The song made my 15 year old ass laugh instantly due to the comedic proportions of talking about how big your dick is and Viagra. Another sketch kicks in after the song called "A Message From The Makers of Ciagra" leading to the official end of talking about Viagravated Assault. Then leading into Beer, Shit, Aids, and bad drugs, basically a song about all four of those, combined into one person to make this stupidly funny and inappropriate tune. Next sketch involves Hugh G. Rection and a nice little dutch oven left for a woman he's in bed with. Thus leading us to our next song, "Nothing Says Loving Like A Brutal Dutch Oven" a song about Dutch Ovening women after fucking them (Nice.) The song just leads on into sharting during the dutch oven, not cuddling after sex or "blowing your load." The dudes in DDATTT say no to spooning and yes to Dutch Ovens! Next, we lead into "I won the Drug War" a song clearly sounding like cocaine laced thrash. Excellent tune. Next we kick into a nice little jam called "The Odor of the Floater"..... I think I'll just let you guess about what that ones about. Next comes the song "I Want To Kill the Black Eyed Peas". Yes, it's about killing the Black Eyed Peas. Which is why I love that tune. More short sketch-age comes in called "Pillow Talk". a sketch about not being able to cuddle with a woman after sex. Which is exactly what  "Post Coital Cuddling Syndrome" the song following the sketch, is about. It's a nice little soft tune for all you slow lovers out there. Two more sketches come after until we hit "Feed the Homeless To Each other." Which is a great idea, because I'm tired of those fuckers. 
This next sketch I like alot because it makes fun of southern people and women. The sketch is called "I'm From Georgia." and it takes us straight into "Retarded Girls" a song about having sex with retarded girls, watching "Merril the retarded chef," and shitting on salad and calling it dressing. Yet another sketch comes (keep in mind this album has 40 tracks...) called "Got Meth?" leading into "Ghetto Biscuits." A song about Meth. MORE Drug refrences are used in the next song "A Friend With Cocaine Is A Good Friend (Until the Cocaine Runs Out)" a Country-ish tune about cocaine. and friends.  The Twenty fourth track "I'm on Probation" is about, you guessed it. Being on Probation. Another sketch kicks in about boobs, and leads into a song about more boobs called "Mandatory Breast Augmentation". The next song is about groupies, "Groupies Make The World Go Round" and leads straight to "Huge Sharts in Cincinnati" a funny sharting incident taken place as a crowd asks for an encore that leads to "Clinching When I Should Have Been Pinching", a song about clinching your butthole instead of pinching. Ending with a nice little clapping session from one of the band members. Next is a soft song called "Good Lovin' Gone Brown" a song about you and your lover shitting on eachother (chorus is sung by Constance X [Nashville Pussy chick})
The next sketch is about Dick D. and Hugh G. drinking Jager! kicking into the next tune "Jagermeister (It's Not For Breakfast Anymore)" as tune about the aftermath of the rad softcore drink Jagermeister. Next is "Hormones In The Beef" (+1 for all the Thrashy-ness) Coming up after is "Don't Want No Fingers In My Butt".... Uhm... Alright. 
Next up we have a song dedicated to one of the best things out there... "Pornography", the 37th song on the album. "Dilation and Extraction" is the 39th track (following the last skit on the album, "A Band With Benefits (slight return)" the song is about accidentally ejaculating in a woman and getting her pregnant... Uh Oh.
We hit the last track on the album, "How To Clear A Room In 5:44", a sketch involving practically all aspects of the album, including the continuation of I Want To Kill The Black Eyed Peas.


Overall, the album is funny, definitely no Psychostick (this is waaaaaaaaaayyy more vulgar and brutal.)
I honestly dig the album, especially the constant fucking with me on the last track. But I would debate how often I would listen to it. Not that I'm saying I don't like it, but it's no album I would listen to Twenty Times a day everyday.


Metal in Ruins rates this album a 7 1/2 Out of a possible 10 Stars! For being rad, metal, and so damn close to  perfect!


Check out the Dick Delicious website HERE and BUY THIS ALBUM PLUS OTHER DDATTT ALBUMS HERE

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